Crawling Down the Yellow Line
While growing up in Broughtontown, Lincoln County, Kentucky, in a country store setting, we were able to interact with all different kinds and types of people. All of us have different personalities and traits, and that is what makes life interesting. I am not sure if every small community had as many different types of people as Broughtontown did, but Broughtontown had to rank somewhere near the top with so many unique personalities.
One young man in Broughtontown was very tight with his money and always anxious to try and make a little more. This fella had grown up very poor and was determined to get ahead in life. His willingness to try just about anything to make a dollar was known by all, and he often was laughed at or made fun of because of this trait. He didn’t let it bother him in the least. He was just anxious to have a little more money.
One day, as the preceding matter was being discussed in my grandparent’s store, someone told the young man he believed the boy would do anything for money. The young man said, “I’ll do anything for money!” After some good-natured banter, a deal was devised. An older man dared the young man to crawl around the blind curve in front of my grandparent’s store in Broughtontown, in the middle of the road, with his pants and underwear pulled down around his knees. The young man asked, “What will you give me?” The older man said, “$5.00.” The young man said he would do it.
Several of us walked out onto the highway. The beginning and ending points of the crawl were agreed upon. It was probably a distance of about 100 yards. Now, I remind you, at this time, the roads were quite grown up and this curve was quite steep and hard to see around. We couldn’t believe this young man was willing to take such a chance because he might get killed. He was undeterred and it seemed as if we could see dollar signs dancing in his eyes.
Someone held the $5.00 bet, and we onlookers headed back to the store porch to watch the festivities. The young man pulled down his blue jeans as he stooped down on all fours, on the yellow line in the middle of the road. He began his crawl down the road and around the curve. His really, really, really, white rear end seemed to glimmer in the afternoon sun. Occasionally this young man would wag his butt back and forth, as if he really wanted to give us all a good show. We were all hysterical as we watched this latest adventure play out before our eyes.
We were all glad a car or truck didn’t come racing down the road and around the curve. It probably would have been a tragedy. If it had happened, I have often wondered how the coroner might have described the incident. The young man got his $5.00, and the older man was happy to give it to him. The young man had earned it. All of us that Saturday afternoon witnessed something most will never have the opportunity to see, and our lives are fuller because of it.
